• Author: Unknown
• Editor: B-7413
• Newspaper: The Umpire volume 5
• Page Number:
• Date: 11 1 1916
• Tags:
• gossip
• inside joke

INSIDE JINGLES

Unnoticed and unsung. The second Block.

A powerful searchlight has been installed on the tower. Must be afraid of the Zeppelins.

“Guilty butnot in Jail’’ is the title of a six-reel feature film exhibited by the Money Men’s Film Company.

A large shipment of blue yarn arrived last week. Perhaps one can now secure a pair of pants before the year 1917.

Whatsamatter, can’t a man practise his ’cordeon without gettin’ called all kinds of names? Nay, nay, Pauline. It seems not.

Scenes of feverish activity abound on the various blocks, especially on the Sixth. You see, Gus is afraid the supply of kalsomine might be cut off.

It is said that brokers on the outside are receiving high rates of exchange. That may be true, but our inside dealers have ’em beaten to a frazzle. Did any one say 60%?

Lost, strayed or borrowed—one large size corn-fed sugar-cured ham. Funny how ham has a propensity for diminishing; it has even been known to vanish into thin air when left unguarded.

The pennant winners of the E. S. P. Ball League are still waiting for those watch fobs. “Buck” says that he might take a half pound for his right now.

The motto of our concrete mixers should be “We eat to live.” The fact is that being exceptionally hungry last Friday they consumed so much macaroni and fish as to leave them incapacitated for any strenuous labor in the afternoon. We would advocate a lighter diet for them, viz., porterhouse steak, French fried potatoes and onions, etc., but probably some of them would not eat meat on Friday.

The price of shoes has advanced 116% in the last five years, of clothing 50%, of food nearly 100%. It’s about time for us to revert back to the Garden of Eden days, when we could pluck both our food and clothing from the trees. But maybe if we do, they would have us up on a charge of using the males to defraud.